Sunday, November 19, 2006

Can you have both?

It seems this week was the one to talk about sex and relationships for a lot of my blogger friends. So, I have a few things to say about it; lots of questions though.

Can you have it all? Truly? Can you have the relationship coupled with almost perfect sex? The only reason I say almost is because some things have yet to be tried. And everyone knows you can't compliment the chef until you have samples all the dishes.

In the past, I have had some phenomenal sex but the relationship sucked. On the other hand, I have had the perfect relationship and the sex sucked. So why is it so damn hard to find both? Is it one of those elusive, soul mate things everyone keeps insisting is out there? Or am I just the only picky one in this world when it comes to relationship and sex?

Yes, I will admit, I have a mental checklist. If a guy meets the criteria, usually, the sex will happen. If he doesn't, forget it, he's a friend. And once he's a friend, it never crosses the line over to the lover section. However, I do have a number of former lovers that are still friends; and they never get to cross back to the other side. It seems my kindergarten teacher was right; I can't stay colored within the lines.

Now, I have found a perfect balance of both. I won't go into details on the sexual side of the relationship but I will tell you that it's all good. The other side of the relationship is almost too good to be true, with maybe one exception but hey, no one is perfect. Intelligent conversation, quite a few mutual interests, common goals for the future and something that is very important: trust and respect.

At any rate, you get the general idea about my new relationship. So the only question that remains unanswered: When will the other shoe drop? Yes, I'm a true pessimist when it comes to relationships and sex. There is always a catch somewhere. Or is there? Can I finally at 32, let go of the fear and just let things happen? I'm thinking so. Now, if we can get this kid situation straightened out, it will ALL be good.

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