I have to wonder why when you are really looking forward to something, time creeps and then flies past you? But when you are dreading a day, it creeps so slow and then the whole day freaken' never ends???????
2 more days. I can do this. I have been through it 9 other times, so what makes this time so different? Is it the fact that I can't have any more children? Not that I want to, but damnit, I should have the choice if I wanted to.
I have been asked by friends & family what do I plan on doing. Well, I'm not quite sure. I damn sure don't wanna be social with my family. Screw that. I don't want a bunch of tears or pity. Ideally, I would like to pretend the day doesn't exist, but I know my heart won't let me do that. Dale has already claimed Andrew for the day, so that goes out the window. I'm certainly not going to spend the day with them, having to listen to the joys of pregnancy and looking at sonogram pictures of the new baby. I would hide in bed all day only if I was wrapped up in someone's arms, just talking. But work comes into play on that, so I'm screwed on that one too.
Shit...I just don't know. I'll figure it out when it gets here.
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