Sunday, February 18, 2007

Jacob's Five Questions

A friend of mine, Jacob, posted an intriguing blog where he was asked 5 questions and in turn, will ask you five questions if you ask him. I asked. I'm willing to do the same. Here is the Q & A session:

1. Tell me three funny sex stories, the catches are that you have to be a part of them and they all have to be true.

a. My ex-husband and I would stay at my mother's house when we were in town. On one particular night, we were doing our thing, and I hear "What are you doing to my daughter?" My mother was outside the room, asking "why" I was making all that noise. She had her .22 pistol ready to fire. I probably should have let her.

b. I had an affair with a married man (yeah, I know, shame on me), so we had to sneak. One day, we did not have anywhere to go, so we decide to use his truck. We drive up to the top of his property (wifey would never look up there) and mid stroke, I hear him say, "did I ever tell you my father is buried up here?"

c. I had a boyfriend who decided to sneak through a window. My sister-in-law lived with us at the time. She was in the living room and my bedroom was off to the side. I had just gotten a new kitten that was quite playful at times. All I remember is a scream, a cat meow and my sister-in-law asking my future husband why he had a pussy hanging off his back.

2. Paul Simon says that there are 50 ways to leave your lover, give me three ways you have left some of yours.

a. Crying on his Mother's doorstep.

b. Packed all his clothes, but them in a trash bag and left it at his father's home, called him and told him he now lived with his father.

c. In his probation officer's custody

3. Do you know anybody you'd be willing to give up your life for? Tell me about the first three people that come to your mind.

a. Without hesitation, my son.

b. Any of my brothers and sisters.

c. All of my nieces and nephews.

4. It's video night; give me the three kinds of drinks/snacks you would want to have the most.
a. Gotta have chips and dip.

b. Mild Cheddar Cheese cut from the block, with ranch dressing on the side

c. Club crackers and cheese.

5. Give me three things that are related to the metaphysical or the occult and tell me why you think they are true or give me three things that you think are bullshit and tell me why.

a. There will be a mix of both. Faith healing. I'm not talking about people who pray for one another when prayers are needed. I'm talking about the television evangelist who welcomes the crippled woman up the stage or sells bottled water as a cure all. Suddenly, she's cured. I take serious issue with this, for two reasons. Money, first and deception second. Faith is a powerful thing. Faith is personal. For one to use a person's faith for personal gain is wrong and unethical. I personally feel these are staged shows and refuse to watch.

b. Spirits, ghosts, or haints. Call them what you will. I strongly believe. Why? Because too many things have happened in my life that cannot be explained by any other definition.

c. Psychics. As the old saying goes, if they can foretell the future, how come they are not lottery winners?

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